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William Burroughs - Advice for Young People

"If you are doing business with a religious son-of-a-bitch, get it in writing. Because his word isn't worth shit, not with the Good Lord telling him how to fuck you on the deal."

Burroughs and I were paid at the same per-word rate for our contributions to "Three Fisted Tales of "Bob" / Short Stories in the SubGenius Mythos" (New York: Simon & Schuster, 1990). Make of that what you will!

My inflated sense of self worth is much higher than most people give me credit for.

old man gets emotional 

Too late for this year's celebration. So count this as early prep for next year.

Don't just eat the hell out of that hamburger.
Hug the hell out of your friend.
Love the hell out of your lovers.
Fuck the hell out of your fuckbuddies.
Thank the hell out of someone nice to you.

They might die suddenly and shut up like hell. Give them everything you've got. Today. Right now.

The IQ (Idiot Quotient) tests mainly for conformity to the CON's agenda. If this trend is reversing, I consider that a GOOD thing!

@onan fax machines...please Lord fax machines go bye bye. Save a few for museums.

Just bears hugging it out. Bears are full of love. Bear hugs are the best. Try it today.

Buying my frop online and picking it up in 15 minutes is a pretty sweet trade-off for having to sit front row as the world burns.

Guess that's the Illuminati programming talking.

We don't stand a cheeseburger's chance at a Subgenius devival.

But if it's your turn to eat it the cheeseburger... Eat the hell out of it! :jrbd:

Are They out to get you? If you are reading this, then They probably are! Find out why in The Book of the SubGenius. Your latent SubGenius powers await!

Lately, when Im out talking with "Them," I'm remembering what it says in the Book of the SubGenius, "Good god, are these supposed to be Christians? They've got Jesus and the Devil all mixed up!" Learn more about The Book at:

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Church of the SubGenius Members-Only MastoDobbs.