Pinned toot

The Decelerationist's Manifesto 


just logged on to the internet and saw a political opinion i didn't agree with.................... all i can say at this point is "yikes"


"The Federal Election Campaign Act (FECA) prohibits any foreign national from contributing, donating or spending funds in connection with any federal, state, or local election in the United States, either directly or indirectly. It is also unlawful to help foreign nationals violate that ban or to solicit, receive or accept contributions or donations from them. Persons who knowingly and willfully engage in these activities may be subject to fines and/or imprisonment."

lol what is the dnc

can't stop thinking about... brush your teeth with old teeth

hmm.. do I..?
・get on the good books with J.R. "Bob" Dobbs before impending doom on X-Day
・learn the sacred forbidden use of the wallet gland
・use the sales techniques therein to become fabulously wealthy overnight...
・live as unlearned po'bucker awaiting 'raise' witholding $35 membership from J.R. "Bob" Dobbs until next paycheck (wtf?)
・mundane usage wallet gland to for overpriced crap
・reduced to shambles with no access to TIME CONTROL.

make the wise choice :jrbd:

very candidly my theory about the subgeniuses from having access the fetid inner circle and having the most slackful revelations in the pstench straight from my third nostril, is that, uhm... X-day did occur as planned in 1998, all the good dues paying subgeniuses !Were! taken on X-day; THIS is the Hell-On-Earth that we are all FRYING in...:cnsp: :cnsp: :cnsp: PROOFS????:cnsp: :cnsp: :cnsp:

sometimes i start to take this subgenius thing too seriously, then i remember, oh yeah... bigfoots revenging upon pinks from their flying saucers and escaping to planet X while oozesquirting with sexaroid goddesses :bigfoot: 🛸

are these 'mr. beast', 'i just frivolously spent inconceivable amounts of money' videos that are getting popular now just about hyperinflation? this is more foreign to me than roblox or among us

life hack, productivity tip:

stop reading for a week, you only think you need to read, though it is often what one does instead of work on art... i just got a lot done, now i'm here to rub it in your faces haha readers

Free leech on my favorite private tracker rn, downloaded ~80 obscure or crappy movies so far, gonna have a slack attack after this

woah man WOOAHH man woah it feels like we're living in a cyberPUNK dystopia, man!! my life sucks and i own a computer o.0 so much dystopia and the worst part is the covernment coverup of coverd nighteen Eighty-Four so fucked up but also cool bleak aesthetic and when are they going to make gynoid sexaroids btw cause it's so dystopian right like mad mike??

^^ I'm so tired of hearing shit like this, the entire internet at this point :abmb:

X-mas is the least important X-related holiday imo ufo notwithstanding

time control, rant 

theres the cliche "i don't know what day it is", but i SERIOUSLY don't know what day it is, EVER

i have no reason to care what day it "is", it's all seriously meaningless to me because i am not domesticated. i'm not punching in for work or school today, tomorrow, or the next day 📅📅📅📅📅 . every day is a haze in my matted hair. you deride the gods and their astrology on your soapbox and then turn around and count the days of the week, "sun day, moon day, fire day" etc. get a clue

haha, sourdough starter and retrocomputing… jus lil lockdown thingz lets normalize this shit 8-D

stupid pinks... fry 'em.

^^ this CONTENT brought to you by THE BLESSED REVEREND, SWAMI U.C. BERKELEY, cement rake and sub, scribe ^^

The moment you stop making people into simps, the world will be free from simps. The Subgenius is a simp-on-purpose in order to fuck you up until you have to confront your own hypocrisy. :fst1:

Onan Canobite?
more like... A Tab on Connie
more like... Cant Inane Boo
more like... Canine on Boat
more like... A non-bat on ice
more like... Canto I Ban One
more like... A Ancient Boon
more like... Beacon Nation
more like... Obtain A Nonce
more like... Bean Onion Act

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Church of the SubGenius Members-Only MastoDobbs.